“My child is the best!” “My child is a monster!” Please jump on the bandwagon of support or shaming in the internet age. We live in a time that propagates support from strangers and unfriending our real-life friends. Screens are EVERYWHERE and so are opinions and pretty much anything you could ever want. How the hell does one protect our kids from everything at once?
I sit back and listen to my sister as she struggles to parent a sneaky teen. Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, any book you want, all a download away. Short of cutting off their hands or chaining them in the basement, how do you respect their privacy AND protect them from themselves? You can’t. So she is the “mean mom”. Her kid is lucky. Other kids have fallen victim to cyberbullying or worse, and depression is running rampant. It cannot be easy to navigate the relationship our teens are having with screens and the internet.
From my own experience, it isn’t just hard with teens. The screentime recommendation for my 7-month-old is zero. Too bad he thinks he is still a part of my body and is mildly interested in Jeopardy while, being held. The recommendations for my older kids is 2 hours a week, or something ridiculous. Ideally, this would be one, family movie night and one 30 minute screen exposure elsewhere. Unfortunately, I like to shower and my family likes to eat, so sometimes they get more TV than that. Ipads, for us, are, completely out of the picture. My kids see those rectangles of doom and lose their minds. They forget how to act like humans. The withdrawal tantrums were not worth my sanity. With this being said, my preschool-aged son tagged along to a hair appointment this week. I charged that thing to ten percent and let him go to town. When it died, I wasn’t the bad guy. Life is about balance.
Screens and apps and internet availability seem to be difficult to navigate at any age. I guess it is all okay, as long as I can still vent to my mommy groups for the focus group support. Those ladies keep me sane. Parenting is so hard. Screentime recommendations are just a piece of the puzzle. My “mommy friends” are essentially a large group of strangers that know a ton about my life and family and vice versa. Luckily, none of my groups have problems with disrespectful members and it is just an invaluable wealth of knowledge, support, and ideas.
The only issue I find myself having is, screens are mildly addictive. I’ve taken months long breaks from my screens. I also try to keep them away during family time. I find myself being more present in the present when I am not actively seeking the perfect photo opportunity for Facebook. While I get fewer pictures of big days, I get more interactions during the event and I’m ok with that.
It is all a balance for me. I would like to be less technology dependent for my kids and myself. I want them to be well-rounded and happy. Sometimes they drive me insane and we all need a break.
2 thoughts on “Parenting in the Age of the Internet”