Have you ever had something really weird happen to you, that sort of sticks with you for the rest of your life? Like a moment that seems average, and in an instant, EVERYTHING gets tossed on its head. I’ve had a couple, but one stands WAY out from the rest.
When I was 8 years old, my father was killed in a drunk driving accident. The driver of the other car was so smashed that he didn’t realize he was driving on the wrong side of the highway for over two miles. He hit my dad head on going 65 miles an hour. My dad’s Ford Pinto pretty much exploded and my dad died on impact. The next day, when the drunk driver awoke handcuffed to a hospital bed, he asked the officer at his bedside if he had really killed someone.
At this time I was a third-grader at an elementary school in Plainwell, MI. Shortly after this my mother and stepfather purchased their first home and we moved to Allegan. A small town about 30 minutes west of Plainwell.
Now, let’s fast forward to the summer of 1999. I’m 17 years old. I’m super fucking cool. I have multi-colored spikes. I wear old man golf pants. I love nu-metal. I have a job working at one of the few restaurants in town doing dishes.
This restaurant was owned by my boyfriend’s family. All of my friends worked there. I hung out there so much they basically just handed me an ugly green apron and told me to get to work. So, this one night we were slammed. My friend John and I were working late to finish up all of the dishes. We were comparing notes on how our parents sucked and were totally out to ruin our lives. I mentioned something stupid about my mom, I’m sure. Some of the details are a little fuzzy, but this next sentence is seared into my brain forever. Nonchalantly, John said, “At least your dad isn’t in prison for manslaughter.”
Holy shit. My stomach just fell out of my butt. I didn’t know what to say for what felt like forever. Finally, I asked, “Ummm, John; What is your dad’s name?”
“Jeff, Why?”
Fuuuuck. My heart was beating out of my chest. I didn’t know how to put this delicately, so I just blurted it out, “HOLY SHIT JOHN, your dad killed my dad.”
And then, in that moment time stood still. I’ve never experienced such an awkward, what-the-fuck kind of moment before or since. They do not make Hallmark cards for this particular occasion. So, I stood there for a ridiculously long amount of time staring stupidly at poor John, who was also dumbfounded and staring at me.
What are the odds that he and I would become friends? Neither of us lived in Allegan before the accident, but we both moved there around the same time. Went to the same school, had the same friends, and had the same job. These were a lot of coincidences to absorb.
John’s super awesome mom also worked at the restaurant, so we wandered upstairs to inform her of what we just learned. When we first told her, she looked at us like we were aliens. Slowly, she started to wrap her brain around what had happened. She was super sweet about it and upset. This lovely woman apologized up and down for not realizing the connection and sitting us down to break it gently. She said she’d followed the case pretty closely. She knew my dad’s last name but it never clicked until we brought it up. We all knew the other’s last names and it never clicked.
Luckily, John and I were able to remain friends throughout the rest of high school. Years later we even reconnected via Facebook. I actually ran into him at a grocery store the other day and was able to give him a big hug, and congratulate him on some big news he recently announced. We agreed it’s been too long and plan to catch up soon.
That’s the funny thing about crazy coincidences like this. Not only do they make excellent stories to share at parties, but the people you share the experience with sort of imprint on you. John and his siblings and mother all hold a special place in my heart. My family’s tragedy was theirs, too. My sister and I aren’t the only kids that lost their father that day. John and his siblings didn’t deserve what they went through, any more than my sister and I did.
Typing all of this out, I have to smile because it just seems so crazy. I honestly wouldn’t believe it myself if I hadn’t been the one to live it. Have you ever experienced a crazy coincidence like this? I’d love to hear about it in the comments!
