Are you “my people?”

**DISCLAIMER: I originally wrote this article months ago…**

So, my friend and I were discussing being moms in a new town. She was telling me how she would meet these extremely nice women. They would warmly welcome her to the town, and ask her how she was enjoying the move, so far. And then, just as she seemed to be hitting it off, they would run off to their already formed group of mom friends in town, and leave her behind. Now, let me explain that my good friend is not a jealous type, or really into any drama at all. She tells things the way they are and really doesn’t take things personally. She wasn’t telling me about her experiences to elicit pity or even to whine. However, her experiences caused her to just step back, and not really try to make mom friends any longer.

Her stories about these moms in her town made me reflect on my own experiences. I didn’t grow up anywhere close to the town I live in, and since my oldest is only 6, I feel as though I am an outsider many times. It’s not the fault of the other mothers, but it is clear that they are already established and comfortable in their group of friends. Even at times when I begin to feel like I am getting close to someone, there is another mother who comes in and further proves that I am still “new” in town.

These stories made me think about how awkward it is to make new mom friends in town. I originally compared it to dating, however, it is totally different because you will see these moms again. If it doesn’t work out, then there’s no way to just forget they exist. I decided that what it comes down to, is the children. If the children click, then there is an opportunity for the parents to click as well. Because really, that is who the friendships form around and are for in the first place. I’m sure I will look back and laugh one day when I am the mom with the children that are engrossed in town activities and have mom friends galore. But, I can’t help but mull over the awkwardness that goes along with meeting new moms.

**An Update… I have mom friends (ha!). I still run into groups that have their own thing going on, but it’s happening. On the flip side, I’ve met moms that aren’t “my people” and that’s okay too. But, to give other moms that are new to this some hope, I am finding moms that are “my people.” They enjoy wine, they like to laugh, they like to poke fun at forgetting everything and anything, they don’t’ take themselves too seriously, and most importantly, they look out for me, and I look out for them. Your people are out there…give it time… In the meantime, laugh it off and have another glass 😉 **